Metapost: I Don't Think You're Ready For This Jelly...

Ahem.  I was thinking that for the autumnal season, I should have a theme.  I mean, an additional theme on top of the Vintage Recipe theme and the Bad Cooking theme.   And what says Fail Fall more than jelly-moulded foodstuffs?  Nothing does! (Ok... probably lots of things say Fall more than gelatinized foods, but I'm going to pretend they don't exist for now.)


There are so many jelly salads and aspics in my recipe books, it would make your head spin!  So, for the next few weeks I'm going to showcase a different jelly-moulded something every week until the end of fall or until I get distracted by something shiny... whichever comes first.  I hope you're just as horrified and delighted by the prospect as I am!


Watch for my first one tomorrow!

Fluffernutter Sandwich

Don't adjust your monitor settings...
I was experimenting with the "antique" filter in iPhoto.

Mini food post!!!  This is one of those foods that is more on the kitschy side of my Venn diagram than the disgusting side, but (as with most things on interweb, and in life) your mileage may vary.

Cookbook Art: The Health Value of Bee Hive Corn Syrup

So, I'd just like to start by apologising for not posting on the weekend... or on Monday... or Tuesday.  I was attending to family issues out of town on the weekend, still exhausted by Monday, then it was grocery shopping after work yesterday.  Not that you should care.  I just like to post a tidbit of awesome cookbook art when I haven't been on-the-ball enough to do a proper recipe like a good little blogger.

So, without further ado, this is the centerfold of the Budget Recipes For Every Day of the Year cooking guide from Bee Hive Brand Corn Syrup and the St. Lawrence Starch Co.  (There is no date on this pamphlet, but I'd estimate early 1960's).

Ok... let me tell you all the things I love about this image:

Savory Meat Loaf

Care for a slice of heart attack?

Uhgggh... there is just soooo much wrong with this dish, I hardly know where to start...  It is a solid brick of greasy meat with a surprising (and not in a good way) core of hard boiled eggs. I have so many questions... Why??? Why does this exist?  For the love of god, why are there hard-boiled eggs in the middle of this culinary monstrosity? What sort of sick joke was the Homemakers Research Institute pulling on humanity?  Were heart attacks not a cause for concern in the the 1960's?  When a person dropped dead with blocked arteries at 41, was that considered a full lifespan instead of a cautionary tale? 

Cover Art: Tasty Table Treats

This is the cover artwork of the Tasty Table Treats cookbook, published in 1947 by Southern Publishing Association:

"Darling, I baked you a pie!  It's made of concentrated nightmares!"

Oh god.  I am afraid of this woman.  She really creeps me out with that psychotic leer.  And the room looks all dark, like she's baking pies at night... in the dark... with her hair perfectly coiffed. Also, the background is at an off-kilter angle, which is cinematic code for waking up tied to a chair.  Your head hurts and the room is spinning.  Did you hit your head?  Were you drugged?  Why are you tied to this chair?  Why is there a wadded-up oven mitt stuffed in your mouth? The room is dark except for the glow of the oven light.  A strange woman enters the room, takes a pie out of the oven, and grins at you. 

We've all been there!  Amiright?  But who wants to relive that horror?  I mean, that was the frickin' worst meringue I ever ate!

Baked Mushroom Noodle Ring

Ok.  Do you see the picture from the cookbook?  You can see why I'd want to make this, right?  I mean, it's noodles glued together into a moulded ring and a pool of mushroom sauce in the center.  It's a bundt cake of noodles!

The Original

Unfortunately, mine did not turn out as nicely as the one in the cookbook...

Happy (late) Labour Day!

So yesterday was Labour Day (labour has a "u" in it when you're Canadian... cuz that's how we roll), and I didn't post all weekend because I was in Victoria visiting with my family and the husband's family.  It was a fun weekend, but the logistics of fitting in all the visits with all of our various family members was as much as I could manage.  Also I have strep throat, which is considerably less fun.


I know all of you are probably getting twitchy from missing your weekly fix of cookbook-related absurdity and sass.  Don't worry.  I won't leave you hanging!  Remember how I mentioned a cookbook called His Turn To Cook in last week's post?

So, check out that red-faced Ken doll guy who is clearly in the throes of some sort of intense meatgasm. I mean, we can clearly see where both of his girlfriend's hands are, so I guess he just really likes skewering meat. Welp... Rule 34, guys. 

Anyhow, if I'm feeling up to it, I may post a mid-week recipe. Thanks for being patient.